You Want A Piece of Me!?
After a long and trying holiday season, a day of rest finally arrived for the head elf. “No more toys, no more cookies… I Need Some Space,” he said. So he set out for his vacation home located at the west end of the North Pole. Too bad for him an ornery raccoon had taken a liking to his favorite rocking chair. “What? You Want a Piece of Me!?” the raccoon said as he rocked back and forth. The tired elf slowly headed back home, where he spent the rest of the week drinking eggnog and changing the words of his favorite Christmas carols.
What to Wear While Watching Your Favorite Non-Christmas Christmas Movies
I have a friend who can rattle off classic Christmas movies like she’s reading the TV Guide listings for any given day in December on ABC Family. Okay, fine. It’s me. You got Rudolph, you got Frosty, even Buddy the Elf. And now, thanks to the brilliant minds at TShirt Laundry, that list includes Bruce Willis.
Posted by TShirt Laundry on 12/20/2012
Mogwai Adoption Service
If you’re looking for a last minute holiday gift, look no further than your neighborhood Mogwai Adoption Service. One of these cute little critters is sure to add extra cheer and excitement to any family gathering. Mogwais are easy to take care of and only require one thing to keep them healthy: Schrute Farm Canned Beets. You best hurry though, all of these creatures need to find a home before the adoption services fall off the impending Fiscal Cliff.
The Pending Alpacalypse
Here at Channel 7 we bring you the latest breaking news at the top of each hour. We expect most of our reporters will be sniffing up the hottest stories all month long – especially on December 21, The Alpacalypse. Tonight we’ll present an award-winning human interest piece aptly titled They USED to Laugh about a red-nosed reindeer who lost his way. We’ll wrap up our newscast by announcing the winner of this year’s biggest lotto jackpot, the Gamer Holiday Sweater. Stay tuned.
The Chicken Dance
World-renowned chef Cap’n Cook unleashed a new delicacy on the culinary world, and it has taken eaters by storm. The dish, The Chicken Dance, is an adaptation of a French classic and is made from all the best ingredients such as fresh vegetables, salty chicken stock and unwashed field greens. A bold yet unique combination of flavors, the recipe even received the praise of The Sofa King, the harshest food critic in town. Now that’s what we call delicious!