I can barely contain my excitement knowing that December is finally here! While there’s an assortment of fantastic holidays this time of year, the best part is that it’s actually National Beard Month! And to commemorate this joyous season it’s now (somewhat) socially acceptable to quit shaving, which is great for me because I’ll be better defended against the freezing Chicago winter winds. For the next 31 days I will not shave my beard in order to better understand the meaning of National Beard Month (which will now on be referred to as NBM).
 
NBM was founded sometime between 680AD and 1860AD. During those days beards were often grown for fertility purposes, proving manliness, as well as denoting one’s social class. Sometime after the Franco-Persian wars (but before the Persian-Franco war), beards were outlawed by the ruling classes of England, Spain, and Europe because they were considered a threat to the royal families’ power due to “grave unsightliness”. This led to a series of rebellions across the known world, all countries rallying under the banner of beard freedom. The uprising finally settled  during the frigid cold of February, sometime around 1552AD.
 
After America was invented, the holiday came over here and for some reason switched to December.  We still grow our beards in remembrance of those dark times.